Blog 018: Where I Day Dream At Night

I woke up at 9 in the morning today but was so sleepy that I just went back to sleep.

Good day! I hope anyone who is reading this is having a wonderful day.

So, I didn’t sleep at all last night because I had all these dreamy scenarios running in my head. When these scenarios happen during the day, it’s called daydreaming. But me on the other hand, I’m the opposite. I am a night dreamer.

You might say, people always dream while they are sleeping, but you see.. I ain’t sleeping. I am trying to sleep but instead of shutting off my brain, so that it goes into sleep mode, I activate it to full charge and start.. day dreaming in the night. Is it only me who does this, or have I some company?!

Well, I’ve had this since I was a child, and it’s not because I dream all day.. it’s because I never day-dream at all. During the day or the time I’m awake, I am so engrossed in doing something or the other that my mind never wanders off anywhere. But when I hit the bed at night, I have absolutely nothing to do. That’s when I’m like, let’s dream of something till I fall asleep. And if you have ever started the train of thoughts at night like I do, then you know that by the time you fall asleep.. the sun is already rising.

And after all this you get up early.. you end up sleeping the whole day. Like I do!

Anyways, keeping my sleep aside, I had a fairly productive day today. I finished my beautiful(at least to me) drawing that I had started 8 days ago. Thanks to being sick, what should have been finished in 3 days was done today, after 8 days. But it’s okay, I’m happy it’s complete and turned out more or less the way I wanted it.

I did take a couple of snaps of the drawing, but since my camera takes shitty pics after sundown, it doesn’t look the same way the drawing does to the naked eye. So, I’ll take a better picture in the morning and upload it tomorrow.

Now some update on my pair of headphones.. they still haven’t arrived yet. *sigh*

I was eagerly expecting and waiting for the headphones to be delivered today but nothing showed up at my doorstep. This wait is actually killing me and I really, really hope I get it tomorrow but I can’t say I have 100% hope.

It’s things like these that make me sad and make me want to not care about anything. It’s not that I don’t mind waiting but that’s what I’ve done practically my whole life. Whenever I wanted something as a kid or even now, I never got it the day I needed it. Neither have I ever got it soon afterward. Everything that I have got, things that I actually wanted.. I have always got it years after I wanted it. And no, there aren’t too many things that I wanted, in fact just 2-3 things, out of which I probably got 2.

One of them was a bicycle. I always wanted a bicycle as a kid. Always. I loved the idea of riding your own bike and going to places on your own. It seemed like a small freedom to me. But whenever I asked for one, I never got it.. and I actually have no idea why. I did get my brother’s 4 year old bicycle.. but after 8 years of asking for one. 8 years.. By that time the roads were overpopulated with vehicles and there was absolutely no way I could ride my bike wherever I wanted. And from next year or so, there was absolutely no one riding bicycles on the streets.

The second thing that I wanted was a guitar, and I didn’t want it just for fun or showing off to my friends. I actually wanted to get into music. I even wanted to attend a music academy to learn professional music recording and stuff. But none of it happened, and I ended up becoming an engineer like almost every other Indian kid. I did end up getting a guitar but that was 6 years after I asked for one. But when I got it, I had no time to practice playing it because I had to study for my degree, which anyways turned out to be not so useful.

These 2 are the only big things that I actually asked for in my life. I’ve never asked for anything bigger and still never do, but I know how it feels to wait for something that you really need it. I waited for many things apart from a bicycle and a guitar and I am still waiting for most of the things, but I know I’ll surely get it someday. I’m positive.

Well, I could end my post here because there’s not much else that happened today. I spent most of my time finishing my drawing and I am happy that I did because tomorrow I can take the day off and work on creating my portfolio on my other website.

I also need to change my ‘About Me’ writeup because, well.. it’s crap. So that needs to go and the new one needs to be more positive, honest and happy.

The only difficulty I am facing while writing is that, I don’t know whether I am improving or not, because there’s no one to tell me. I do get one or two likes, surprisingly, but it would be really great if someone told how I’ve done so far in terms of writing.

Anyways, it’s not an issue and I’m just happy that I am writing.It helps me channel my thoughts into words.

So, I guess that’s it. No MT as I did talk about waiting for things and that could be taken as the topic of my midnight talk today. I could probably end that with – never lose hope on the things you want. If it is meant for you, then you will surely get it. You just need to wait till the right time.

And even if you don’t get it, don’t lose hope. There’s always something else in store and more often than not, it’s always better.

Have a great day. :)

Goodnight.

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